New Photo (or It Reminds Me of The Old Me)

I had my photo shoot with Joanna Brooks on Friday. I haven’t gotten all of my photos in an online proof sheet yet, but I should have that by Wednesday.

We did a lot of the shoot in her studio that she created in her garage (she has a very understanding boyfriend who gave up parking his car in there so she could make a studio), but we did go out to a freeway underpass to shoot one of the looks.

While driving back from the location to her house, Joanna let me look at some of the photos in her camera so I could see how I looked. I was scrolling through the photos when one made me stop and gasp. There was one photo that looked so much like a photo that I look when I was 100 pounds lighter. I was so surprised to see it that it almost felt like I was kicked in the stomach.

I don’t know if anyone else will see the similarity (I think it has a lot to do with my chin and shoulder positioning), but here are the two photos side by side.

 

I think that the new photo (in the green) is way better than the old photo. I look younger and fresher, which is funny since the one in the blue was taken in 2007.

Even looking at them now, I can’t help see the similarities in the photos. It’s weird. It’s almost as if there is a sign that I’m not as far from the old me as I think that I am. Even though I have a lot of weight to lose, that’s all that keeping me from getting back to the old me (although I probably won’t go back to the shorter hair for a while).

This reminder is really helping to motivate me. I haven’t been doing so great with cutting out my favorite drink, Diet Coke. I know that when I’m not drinking soda I seem to eat a bit healthier. I’m making it my goal to seriously limit my soda drinking.

But I will allow my self to possibly have a rum and Diet Coke at the after party for the “#140Characters” screening tomorrow! Tickets are still available if you’d like to come!

Updating Me (or It Never Hurts To Ask)

This morning, I had a phone meeting with Joanna Brooks, who is the photographer that I’ll be using for some new headshots. I’m getting some new headshot done because I’ve been using these two for a while and I want some new ones.

And yes, I am wearing the same shirt in both pictures. I didn’t think about that at the time I was taking the second one, but I know that color looks good on me based on Jill Kirsh’s color methods. They are both great pictures, and I love both of the photographers that I worked with, but I need a change.

This photo is pretty much the only thing that decides whether or not I get an audition. When hundreds of actors are submitted for the same job, I need to make sure that my photo stands out and gets their attention.

Joanna and I had a really great phone meeting. I love her energy and she has some great ideas on how to shoot me in order to get the results that I am hoping for.

I had also brought up my weight loss in our phone meeting and my concern about having to do new pictures every time I lose 25-30 pounds. I asked about possibly pre-paying for a bunch of smaller sessions so I could use them when I needed an updated shot. Joanna was so sweet about it on the phone and she gave me a deal for future update shoots that will work perfectly for my budget and what I’ll need. So the plan for me for photos is one shoot this month with 3 looks, update shoots while I’m losing weight, and then once I’m at a weight that I’m happy with and am able to maintain (which is always the tough part) then we’ll do another big shoot then.

I’m so happy that I was able to work something out that works for both her and I. I’m always nervous to ask for something different or special, but if you never ask, you’ll never know. I think the confidence to ask for things like this has come from my day job. When I’m taking orders, we are supposed to ask if the customer would like to also make a donation to help our educational programs. Donations are the main thing that help keep that program alive. At first, I was so scared to ask for the donations. But now, I’m fearless with it. The worst someone can say is no, and then I’m no worse off than I was before I asked.

I’m just glad that when I asked Joanna about update photo shoots for me, she said yes. Now I have another motivation to keep me on this weight loss journey, however long it may take.

Back to the Grind (or It’s Time to Be a Little Selfish)

I’ve had a lot of fun stuff lately. My dad left to go back yesterday and now I’m back to the normal grind of stuff until I go to my friend’s wedding in October.

I’m getting over a cold/sinus infection/allergy thing right now, so my energy is a little low. But I’m trying to stay upbeat and beat this bug in my system ASAP!

After so much excitement, it can be hard to get back to the groove of things. I just had 2 days off of work, but now it’s back to 6 days a week. I’ve had company, but now I need to focus on myself a bit.

I’ve mentioned before about fall tv season starting. This is not only a time for research on new shows, it also means that tv is in high production right now and I want to help my agents get me as many auditions as possible. I need to be selfish for a bit and make me the best me I can be.

I’ve got Marci Liroff’s class starting this week which will help me out with the auditions I get. But I’m also looking at getting new headshots as those are the main tool that help me get those auditions.

I’m running into a problem though. I have headshots that look like me right now:

These are great, and when I walk into the audition room, I know that the casting director is going to recognize me as the girl in the picture. And that’s really important.

But after not really eating food for a while, I’ve lost 10 pounds. I don’t feel like I look any different, but that’s got me thinking. How much weight do I need to lose before I do new headshots?

Headshots aren’t cheap. I usually end up spending around $400 for the shots and a makeup artist (which I have found to be a necessity for headshots, not a luxury). If I’m hoping to lose 100 pounds, do I do new pictures every 25 pounds or when I just feel like I don’t look the same any more? I don’t have tons of money right now to spend on them, so I’m thinking of talking to some photographers that I’ve worked with in the past and that I want to work with now and see if someone will maybe let me do a bunch of small sessions where I only get 1 or 2 looks each time.  But I’m not sure anyone will be willing to work on a deal like that.

And I can’t just use pictures that are from when I was thinner, because I don’t look like that person at all. My hair is different (cut and color) and I’m not that young anymore. Here’s one of my headshots from thinner days:

 

I’m looking forward to figuring out what the solution is going to be for getting updated headshots as I lose weight. I also can’t wait to see what my new pictures will look like in the future.

But I also can’t focus too much on what might happen. It’s another of the “what if” situations. So I’m just putting my head down, working hard, and conquering any problem that comes up when it comes up.

I Wish I Was 4 Again (or Where Did My Confidence Go?)

On Saturday after work, I headed over to my friend Erin’s house. Erin started out as my hairstylist back in 2006 and we quickly became friends.

When I don’t have enough money for her to do my hair, she’ll do it free as a favor. And when she needs a babysitter for her 2 kids, I’ll help her out for free too.

On Saturday, she was going to do my hair and then I was going to watch her kids so she and her husband could have a date night. After my hair was done, I started playing with her kids (who I will refer to as O and K to protect their privacy).

I’ve been watching her daughter O since she was 1 (she’s 4 now) and I’ve been watching her son K since he was a week old (he’s 1 now). I love her kids. They are so much fun and her daughter has the cutest most ridiculous personality. When O was 2 and I was over babysitting, she asked her mom “what beverage do you suggest I have with my movie?”. Seriously?!?!? What kid says that?

On Saturday, O decided to model her new back to school boots for me. I held up my phone to take a picture and instantaneously she went into a crazy pose. Then she posed a couple more times and demanded that I take pictures of those too.

She never worried about looking silly or if that wasn’t the best angle for her. I wish I could be that calm when taking a photo.

Whenever I’m having my photo taken (headshots or casual photos), I’m always thinking about how I’m posed. Is this my best side? Do I look thin? How is my hair? Am I more towards the back so I look skinnier? I once read that if you press your tongue to your teeth when you are smiling, your face looks much thinner. So I always do that.

I wish that I could have the carefree confidence that O has. It’s so freeing and beautiful to watch. I’ll have to act more like her in the future.

Creating My Bombshell House (or I’m Glad I’m Mom Is Great At Decorating)

One of the things necessary for feeling like a bombshell is having a great home. It doesn’t have the be a big house (I live in a 400 square foot bungalow), but it needs to be comfortable and feel like home.

When I moved into my current place, I was going from a 1600 square foot 2 bedroom apartment that I shared with roommates to my little house where I live alone. Clearly, not all of my things would make the move. I ended up selling a lot of stuff on craigslist and making a bunch of stops at Goodwill with donations.

When I finally moved into my new place, it didn’t feel like home. It seemed cold and not friendly at all.

Enter my mom.

My mom kicks ass at decorating. She’s done an awesome job on the house I grew up in (although she’s had help in organizing the study and her closet from me). And as soon as my mom saw my house, she knew exactly what I needed.

She got me some artwork (cheaply at Bed Bath and Beyond) and a new area rug. And since I’ve moved in 2.5 years ago, my mom continues to help me make my house feel like a home.

One of my favorite things that my mom has given to me for my house is my photo collage on canvas.

I helped by picking out some of my favorite pictures and choosing the colors, but my mom made it look awesome. I have it above my desk, and since my house is so small, I can see it from most places in my house.

I think that when you have things you love and that make you smile in your house, it makes it a home. And part of being a bombshell is being comfortable where you are.

I’m glad my home is one place that I feel awesome.